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Dear ,
When we start moving – internally or physically - no matter in which direction, we make the first step into something new. Even if we don’t know yet what that “new” means.
When I talk about movement I don’t mean pushing or pulling. I talk about a movement that comes from deep inside. It is born out of a deep knowing that something is waiting to be moved – and we respond.
And yes, it can be frightening – not only for us but also for others. Sometimes we hesitate to move because we are afraid of the consequences. We do not take responsibility for allowing that movement inside of us to take shape.
We push it down, we ignore it, maybe for years. And then what would once have been a gentle wisp of wind could transform in a storm that might even be destructive.
But when we listen to it, move with it, gently, trusting it, the most beautiful things might happen.
Today I will share with you again a personal story of inner and outer movements.
In 2018 we left Malta and moved to the UK. One year later, after coming back from a business trip, my husband told me. “I have made a decision; I will move to Bulgaria. I cannot live in the UK anymore.” As you can imagine, in a first moment, this was a shock for me. What would it mean for us as a couple, as a family? I knew, I wanted to stay in the UK for at least one more year until our daughter would finish the A-Levels.
Friends who got to know about it called my husband selfish and considered his decision as quite unacceptable.
And yet for me it did not take long to understand that it was a movement he needed to make, an inner movement that he could not suppress. It had nothing to do with our relationship. He needed to follow it, for himself. And so – despite of all the insecurities, not knowing where it would lead us to – I supported him in his quest.
What can I say? It was one of the best decisions he ever made. For himself, for me, for us as a couple and for us as a family.
When talking about her parents and sharing that they lived in different places, our daughter was often asked if her parents were separated or divorced. She always laughed and said, no, they are better with each other than ever.
Since then, until recently, we have lived in a long-distance relationship with a lot of inner and outer movements on both sides. Between different countries and cities. And all these movements helped us to grow – to grow as individuals and as a couple.
The last physical movement was towards one place where we now are living together again, happy to have each other, with gratitude, knowing that it is a gift, and continuing to support each other in our mutual movements.
This is just an example of a movement that started out of the blue and brought so much benefit to everyone who surrendered.
Movements can happen in all life situations. They do not necessarily have to have a physical outcome. They could be just tiny ones and others might not even realize. It could be inner movements, away from something that you are ready to let go – fears, ideas, believes, dreams, patterns.
Are there any movements that are waiting inside of you? Movements that are only yours? Are you following them, or do you push them down? Do you dare to voice your need to move, or do you silence it?
Are you blocking the movements of others? Out of fear, anger, neediness? Are you allowing others to voice their need for a movement? Partners, children, family members, friends?
A truly healing movement does never arise from a need to run away from someone or something. It comes from a place of deep love for ourselves, for our truth and our growth. And sometimes it is just about surrendering to the movement of life.
May you have a gently moving month of November.
In the spirit of love and reconciliation
Ursula |
