|
Dear ,
I wonder if you have noticed how often we mix up the words “fate” and “destiny”. At least, what I realized, in the English language. Even when we look them up on the internet they are frequently used as synonyms.
But lately I heard an interview with Alberto Villoldo and what he said really struck me – so I want to share it with you today. He said:
“Fate is a story that’s been written for you by somebody else.
Destiny is a story that you write.”
Just let that sink in a bit and see what comes up for you. Do you feel the difference?
And it resonates so much with what Viktor E. Frankl said: “It is not about us asking life why it put us in that situation, but about life asking us, what we do with that situation.”
Family constellation work is based on “acknowledging what is”, “being in peace with where we come from”, “reconciling with the past” and ultimately with our fate.
And interestingly enough it is always this reconciliation that brings healing and change. Because, when we stop fighting the past, we can gather our strength and focus on the present to create a future in which we can live our destiny.
This is also the process that we go through in a constellation. From fate to destiny. We see and acknowledge where we come from, we reconcile with the past and we are free to connect with our destiny.
We are born into a family – and even if we believe that our soul chose our family before conception, still we arrive in a story that has been written by others - by all our ancestors. Every single chapter of that story has been there before we came into this life. This is our fate.
And then there is our destiny. The “destination” we are longing to reach. Our dreams, our calling, our visions.
When we fight our fate, when we try to change it, when we reject it, we lose. Simply because it is an impossible endeavor. But when we are in peace with it and acknowledge it, when we give it a place in our heart we can turn around and walk in the direction of our destiny.
In that very moment we start writing the first chapter of a new story, a story that is truly ours. A story of love, courage and trust. And then it does not matter when or if we eventually arrive at our destination, because while we are writing we discover who we are, chapter by chapter. And as in a book, dreams might change, adventures might happen, unexpected situations might come up – but everything is written by us. No longer by someone else. And even if we don’t reach the final chapter, it is yet our story.
May you all start writing your own stories – with love, courage and trust.
In the spirit of love and reconciliation
Ursula |
